


@God, please dont hate us

by KianStrugglesToEven



Series: Kinky Memes [2]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Multi, Texting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-14
Updated: 2017-02-14
Packaged: 2018-09-24 08:26:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,849
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9713315
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KianStrugglesToEven/pseuds/KianStrugglesToEven
Summary: Pegarita: WHAT THE FRICK MANPegarita: What the FRICKPegarita: SEND HELPPegarita: SOMEONE CALL NINTENDODamilton: Peggy what the shit?MacaaroniAndMe: Nintendo? What?Angeli-kickyourass: Are you playing animal crossing again?Or: Why on earth is there mor- wait is that Maria?





	

**Author's Note:**

> Damilton - Alexander  
> Turtle.Boi - John Laurens  
> JeSuisChrist - Lafayette  
> 4SetsOfCorsets - Hercules  
> Angeli-kickyourass - Angelica  
> NarrativeControl - Eliza  
> Pegarita - Peggy  
> GWash(ingMachine) - G.Wash  
> SicklyAndPrickly - James  
> MacaroniAndMe - Thomas  
> ABurrSir - Aaron  
> NOW FEATURING:  
> KinkGeorge as King George 3  
> TheCoolerWashington as Martha Washington  
> and LittleRedDress as Maria Reynolds

NarrativeControl added Damilton, 4SetsOfCorsets, JeSuisChrist and ABurrSir to "Bitch, my shitlist."

Damilton: WELL IF IT ISNT MR BURR, SIR  
ABurrSir: Alexander.  
ABurrSir: Miss Schuyler, may i ask why i have been added to a seperate chat?  
ABurrSir: One with a quite menacing name, if i may add  
NarrativeControl: Burr, welcome to the John Protection Squad Chat  
NarrativeControl: You have been added as we wish to discuss your growing relationship with our precious John.  
4SetsOfCorstes: This is basically the "You hurt him you die a slow, agonizing, torturous death" talk  
JeSuisChrist: Y E P  
ABurrSir: Ah.  
NarrativeControl: Thanks Herc i wanted to say that.  
NarrativeControl: But yea thats basically what this is  
Damilton: Burr, John is literally the most innocent, precious lil bean that has ever existed on this earth  
4SetsOfCorsets: And he has been very happy following the start of your shared relationship  
JeSuisChrist: And we very much enjoy him being this happy.  
NarrativeControl: So if you even dare hurt him, i will not hesitate to fucking destroy you, in anyway i can think how.  
Damilton: Do you understand this, Burr?  
ABurrSir: Yes, i understand, and please don't worry, i wouldn't even think about hurting John.  
JeSuisChrist: G O O D  
NarrativeControl: Well, now that that has been said,  
*NarrativeControl changed the chat name to "Johns Squad Of Protection"*  
Damilton: Welcome to the club, Burr.  
\----------------------------------  
"Help Us"  
Pegarita: WHAT THE FRICK MAN  
Pegarita: What the FRICK  
Pegarita: SEND HELP  
Pegarita: SOMEONE CALL NINTENDO  
Damilton: Peggy what the shit?  
MacaaroniAndMe: Nintendo? What?  
Angeli-kickyourass: Are you playing animal crossing again?  
Damilton: She cant be playing animal crossing her 3DS broke  
Angeli-kickyourass: No, the blue 3DS broke, hers is the pink one?  
Damilton: No, MINE is the pink one, and that went missing like, a month ago  
Damilton: The blue one was Pegs and she broke it  
Angeli-kickyourass: She's been using a pink one  
Damilton: ...  
Damilton: MARGARITA SCHUYLER DID YOU STEAL MY FUCKING DS??  
Pegarita: Yes and that isnt the issue right now  
Pegarita: So i went to the Island on Animal Crossing  
Pegarita: And you know how theres like, a multiplayer option so you can hang out with random strangers?  
Damilton: I did, until someone stole my fucking DS  
Pegarita: Yea well i went there cause ya know, why the fuck not, my character looks cute, i can make the 10 year olds jealous  
MacaroniAndMe: Why tho  
Pegarita: I worked hard to make my character cute fight me  
Pegarita: So i go to the island, and there are these two kids there, and theyre like talking, i guess? I wasnt really paying attention to what they where saying UNTIL  
Pegarita: One of them says, and this is a fucking quote, "I'll give you money if you suck me"  
Pegarita: And THE OTHER WAS LIKE, OKAY AND NOW THEY KEEP TYPING SEX NOISES AND ITS FUCKING AWFUL AND IM FREAKING THE FUCK OUT YALL  
Damilton: JUST LEAVE THE ISLAND?????  
Pegarita: I WOULD BUT THE ORIGINAL KID IS ACTUALLY DROPPING MONEY??? AND EVERYTIME THE KID PICKS IT UP AND GOES INSIDE I PICK UP A COUPLE BAGS LMAO  
Angeli-kickyourass: Why would you do that?  
Pegarita: look these are bags of 99,000 and i am fucking poor on this game let me L I V E  
Damilton: I want my fucking DS back Peggo i will fight you for it  
Pegarita: F i n e  
MacaroniAndMe: Animal Crossing sounds wild  
Angeli-kickyourass: You would be suprised at how weird kids games can get  
\--------------------------------------  
SicklyAndPrickly: WHat even is my life  
4SetsOfCorsets: ???  
SicklyAndPrickly: So im just sat on the bus with Dolley  
JeSuisChrist: Dolley?  
SicklyAndPrickly: My girlfriend  
JeSuisChrist: Oh, Okay  
SicklyAndPrickly: So im just sat on a bus with Dolley, and it stops at a stop, and its sat for a couple minutes cause a shit ton of people got on  
SicklyAndPrickly: and this guy just bangs on the window im near  
SicklyAndPrickly: And begins a g g r e s s i v e l y dabbing at me  
4SetsOfCorsets: W h a t  
SicklyAndPrickly: Now, i have no clue what someone should do in that situation  
SicklyAndPrickly: So i dabbed back.  
Angeli-kickyourass: W H Y  
Damilton: Jesus Christ James  
SicklyAndPrckly: Dolley just looked at me and said " Why the fuck would you do that." in the most Burr like voice i have ever heard  
ABurrSir: "Burr like voice"?  
SicklyAndPrickly: Yea, ya know, emotionless and opinionless  
Damilton: Savage Jemmy returns  
Turtle.Boi: Christ guys  
Angeli-kickyourass: Where the heck have you been?  
Turtle.Boi: Aaron and I /where/ on a date, and then he started frowning at his phone so i figured i may aswell hop into the group chat  
Pegarita: Goddam you little shits go finish your fucking date  
Turtle.Boi: Yes Mooooom  
NarrativeControl: Fuck off im the mom friend of this squad  
NarrativeControl: Now go finish your fucking date.  
ABurrSir: Of course.  
\----------------------------  
NarrativeControl: Who even let Charles Lee teach at this school  
Turtle.Boi: He's the maths professor, right?  
NarrativeControl: Yea and like  
NarrativeControl: He isnt a bad guy or anything, but he is fucking awful at maths  
NarrativeControl: Like in class today we where solving some algebraic bullshit and he was going through the solutions  
NarrativeControl: and he got to the end of it and all that had to be done was divide 8 by 6  
NarrativeControl: and he got 1.5  
NarrativeControol: When it should of been 1.4  
Damilton: That doesnt seem like a big issue?  
NarrativeControl: It is when your teaching advanced mathematics and thats fucking elementary school level maths  
NarrativeControl: Nobody corrected him cause we where so confused UNTIl  
NarrativeControl: George Fredrick, that british kid?  
4SetsOfCorstes: The Literal prince of england?  
NarrativeControl: Yea that one  
NarrativeControl: Just pipes up from the back: "Now, im not sure if we do maths differently in England, but, i believe that should be One, Point, Four."  
JeSuisChrist: I know George Fredrick, we're in "Foreign Royalty" club together  
MacaroniAndMe: "Foreign Royalty" Club?  
JeSuisChrist: Yea, its a club where all of the foreign royalty in this school meet up and bitch about being foreign and royal  
JeSuisChrist: We are the only two members of the club  
SicklyAndSavage: Yea, sounds like it has some pretty specific requirements to join.  
Damilton: George Fredrick is great lmao  
Damilton: He has like, some of the best make up skills on campus  
Pegarita: Agreed  
Angeli-kickyourass: Excuse me?  
Damilton: Angelica, your skills are good, but he is so good its like he has been professionally trained or something  
NarrativeControl: I once watched him do to perfect wings without even using tape  
Angeli-kickyourass: Right someone add this motherfucker i want make up tips  
*JeSuisChrist added KinkGeorge to "Help us"*  
KinkGeorge: Ooh whats this  
Angeli-kickyourass: Right motherfucker i want to know how you do make up so well  
KinkGeorge: Oh, i've been professionally trained you see  
Damilton: CALLED IT  
KinkGeorge: Oh hello Alexander dear!  
Damilton: Hey Freddie ~  
Angeli-kickyourass: Why the heck did you get professional training?  
KinkGeorge: Oh, i'm required to wear make up when on television with my family so that i dont look less than perfect, and with my haptophobia, nobody can touch me, so i got training to do it myself  
Angeli-kickyourass: Ah, thats reasonable  
NarrativeControl: Sorry, Haptophobia?  
KinkGeorge: Ah, It is an Extreme fear of touch  
NarrativeControl: Ohhh okay, i understand  
Angeli-kickyourass: Will you teach me some ~~ Professional ~~ makeup techniques? (( Only if your free or want to tho ik we literally only met like 5 seconds ago))  
KinkGeorge: Oh sure! I taught Alexander Dearest how to do his make up  
Pegarita: Is that how you got so good all of a sudden, Alexander?  
Damilton: Yea pretty much  
KinkGeorge: I am free now if you are Angelica  
JeSuisChrist: (( Free from the colonys, amiright?))  
KinkGeorge: I fucking wish laf  
KinkGeorge: I fuckin wish  
\--------------------------  
Damilton: How many of GWashs fingers do you think could fit in me?  
ABurrSir: W H A T  
Damitlton: SHIT THIS IS THE WRONG FUCKING CHAT OH MY GOD PLEASE IGNORE  
MacaroniAndMe: ALEXANDER WHAT THE SHIT  
Pegarita: Like, 1 with a little pain, and 4 if your willing to power through  
Damilton: PEGGY NO  
Angeli-kickyourass: WHO WHERE YOU EVEN TRYING TO SEND THAT TO OH MY GOD  
\--------------------  
*"@God please dont hate us" - Damilton, NarrativeControl, MacaroniAndMe and JeSuisChrist*  
Damilton: ...  
Damilton: So how many  
JeSuisChrist: Oh i agree with peggy 4 would be the limit  
MacaroniAndMe: Yea his hands are huge dude you aint getting all of that in  
NarrativeControl: Yea, his hands are huge, and Alexander is small as shit  
NarrativeControl: I'd say no more than three.  
Damilton: Thanks guys  
\----------------------------------------------  
*"Help Us"*  
NarrativeControl: Why can i hear screaming from the english department  
Pegarita: Did Thomas spill food again?  
Angeli-kickyourass: Why are you both on your phones its class hours  
NarrativeControl: Im in maths with Lee and we can hear the screaming  
KinkGeorge: He let us on our phones to find out whats going on  
Pegarita: Where the fuck are the english boys at we need answers  
KinkGeorge: Its getting louder what the fuck  
NarrativeControl: I just heard the patented Thomas Jefferson Scream™  
Angeli-kickyourass: The one he does when something happens to his hair is pulled?  
NarrativeControl: Yep  
Pegarita: Why did a bunch of the fashion kids just sneak past my classroom?  
4SetsOfCorsets: Because fashion kids are a deadly force  
4SetsOfCorsets: And we can hear the screaming from the basement and we want a n s w e r s  
Pegarita: Keep us updated please  
4SetsOfCorsets: Of Course  
Angeli-kickyourass: Is the screaming still happening?  
NarrativeControl: Its stopped for now but Herc, have you any answers?  
4SetsOfCorsets: We are in the corridor.  
4SetsOfCorsets: Every other english class is lingering outside their rooms, except GWash's  
Pegarita: I bet it was Alexander and Thomas screaming  
4SetsOfCorsets: We are outside the classroom  
SicklyAndPrickly: STAY OUTSIDE WE CANT OPEN THE DOOR  
NarrativeControl: JAMES WHAT IS GOING ON  
SicklyAndPrickly: YOUR FUCKING BROTHER THATS WHATS GOING ON  
Angeli-kickyourass: Oh my god what did he do  
Damilton: ITS NOT MY FAULT  
SicklyAndPrickly: GET OFF YOUR PHONE AND CATCH THAT THING  
Damilton: HE IS NOT A THING HIS NAME IS PHILIP AND HE IS BEAUTIFUL  
Pegarita: WHAT THE FUCK  
Damilton: I found a kitten outside on my way to class and he looked so cold so i put him in my hoodie  
Pegarita: And went to class?  
Damilton: Obviously  
Damilton: So i get to class  
Damilton: and im learning away  
SicklyAndPrickly: Then thomas notices that something in Alexanders jacket was moving, and he was being like, supoer fidgety  
SicklyAndPrickly: And he points this out to me  
SicklyAndPrickly: And we just see this brown mess of fur climb out from the back of the jacket  
Damilton: He's a wriggly fella  
SicklyAndPrickly: SHUT UP AND CATCH THE FUCKING CAT  
SicklyAndPrickly: And this mess of brown fur jumps from Alexanders hood.  
SicklyAndPrickly: Straight into Samuel Seaburys hair  
Damilton: Which is where the screaming began  
Damilton: It continued because Philip kept jumping from person to person  
MacaroniAndMe: IT GOT IN MY HAIR AND IT R U I N E D IT  
Damilton: Philip is currently settled in front of the classroom door and myself and GWash are trying to get close without spooking him  
Pegarita: Jesus Christ Alexander  
KinkGeorge: OH MY DEAREST SEABURY!  
KinkGeorge: Alexander ensure that you apologise to Samuel for the stress this will of caused  
Damilton: I will dont worry  
NarrativeControl: Oh my god Alexander  
Angeli-kickyourass: How did GWash react to this whole fiasco?  
MacaroniAndMe: He literally just looked on with a bored expression  
SicklyAndPrickly: Like he had seen this happen before  
Damilton: Im gonna be in so much trouble after this  
NarrativeControl: Alexander where are you gonna keep him? The dorms dont allow pets  
Damilton: ,,,,, but your apartment does  
NarrativeControl: Are you asking me to look after this cat for you?  
Damilton: Not by yourself, it'd be a joint effort, like a kid.  
Damilton: I even named him after Dad like you said you would with your first kid  
Damilton: Pleaaase, Best of sisters, best of women?  
Angeli-kickyourass: Wow, rude  
Pegarita: Shut up Angelica she is the best of us  
NarrativeControl: Fine, philip can stay with me.  
Damilton: YAAAAYYYYY  
MacaroniAndMe: Wait why does Eliza have an appartment while the rest of you live in the dorms?  
Damilton: Shes the favourite  
NarrativeControl: No, Dad had a deal that whichever one of us stayed as innocent as possible got an appartment when we went to college  
NarrativeControl: I was just better at hiding the fact i was drunk.  
Pegarita: Yep, that sounds about right  
NarrativeControl: What does Philip look like anyway?  
MacaroniAndMe: Satan incarnate  
SicklyAndPrickly: Honestly the best way to describe him would be John Laurens as a cat  
NarrativeControl: Oh, nice  
\------------------------------  
GWash(ingMachine): Alexander while i understand your heart was in the right place, please refrain from bringing animals to lessons, as they aren't allowed in the classrooms.  
Damilton: Why do you let Thomas in then?  
GWash(ingMachine): Alexander.  
Damilton: Okay, sorry, i wont do it again.  
GWash(ingMachine): Good :).  
\---------------------------  
*Damilton sent WhyISHeSONICE.screenshot to "HelpUs*  
Pegarita: Washington, back at it again with the cute emoji use  
Turtle.Boi: Peggy, back at it again with the stale memes  
JeSuisChrist: We have just arrived and we have read up, what the fuck Alexander?  
ABurrSir: I kind of regret missing that spectacle  
Damilton: (( HOLY SHIT WAS THAT ))  
Angeli-kickyourass: (( AN OPINION? ))  
ABurrSir: you cant see me but i just sighed  
4SetsOfCorsets: Where the heck where you guys?  
Turtle.Boi: In class, with our phones of, like they should be?  
JeSuisChrist: I was working on a new violin piece i couldnt check my phone lmao  
Damilton: OOh did you finish it?  
JeSuisChrist: Alas, i did not, im still waiting for a piano composition from one of the other students  
4SetsOfCorsets: ahh your violin stuff is always so nice  
JeSuisChrist: Thanks!  
\-------------------------  
SicklyAndPrickly: This just in, Peggy Schuyler admits to being a Necrophiliac  
Pegarita: WHAT THE FUCK JAMES?  
SicklyAndPrickly: " I mean if it's like death kink then same choke me into the grave" - Margarita Schuyler, 2k17  
Pegarita: Theres a difference between wanting to fuck the dead and wanting to be dead, James.  
Turtle.Boi: Omfg  
Angeli-kickyourass: Well i mean, Peggy you are a thirsty hoe  
Pegarita: oh my god  
KinkGeorge: I c a n t b r e a t h e  
SicklyAndPrickly: Dont die near Peggy George  
Pegarita: Excuse you i'm gay  
4SetsOfCorsets: Hi Gay  
NarrativeControl: herc NO  
4SetsOfCorsets: I ' m D a d  
\---------------------------------------  
Damilton: LaFAYETTE WHERE ARE MY KNITTING NEEDLES  
JeSuisChrist: Idk where did you see them last?  
Damilton: They where on my desk of things that should not be touched AND THEY HAVE CLEARLY BEEN TOUCHED  
4SetsOfCorsets: Have you checked your knitting bag?  
Damilton: Of COURSE I CHECKED MY KNITTING BAG  
4SetsOfCorsets? Are you sure? cause your knitting bag is literally in my hand rn  
Damilton: ...  
Damilton: Are my needles in there?  
4SetsOfCorsets: Yes they are, now hurry up or we're gonna be late  
Pegarita: Where are you two going that requires knitting utensils  
NarrativeControl: We would be going to knitting club if Alexander would hurry the fuck up  
Damilton: Yea yea im on my way rest your breasts Eliza  
4SetsOfCorsets: Hakuna those tata's babe  
NarrativeControl: Shut up, both of you  
Pegarita: Have fun at knitting club y'all  
MacaroniAndMe: Peggy your from new york you cant say y'all  
Pegarita: Fight me southern boi  
MacaroniAndMe: Excuse you i am a southern belle  
Pegarita: tf is a southern belle?  
SicklyAndPrickly: Oh Mr Jefferson sir! ~  
MacaroniAndMe: Oh Lord its mighty hot out today! ~  
JeSuisChrist: Im terrified  
Pegarita: Same  
ABurrSir: Leave the southerners to their weird southern ways  
\-----------------------------  
NarrativeControl: I HAVE BEEN GIVEN A GIFT  
NarrativeControl: THIS IS BEAUTIFUL  
Turtle.Boi: can the rest of us get an explanation?  
Damilton: HUSH ELIZA  
4SetsOfCorsets: SO WE ARE AT KNITTING CLUB  
NarrativeControl: AND ALEXANDER IS TALKING TO ONE OF THE REGULARS, MARTHA  
Damilton: PLEASE BE QUIET  
4SetsOfCorsets: AND MARTHA IS LIKE "Oh so what school do y'all go?"  
NarrativeControl: Alexander - "Oh, i study English at Kings College!"  
4SetsOfCorsets: Martha - "Oh, my elder brother is an english professer at kings college!"  
NarrativeControl: A- "Ah, whats his name?"  
4SetsOfCorsets: M- "George Washington"  
Angeli-kickyourass: OHMYGOD  
NarrativeControl: ALEXANDER JUST SHUT DOWN  
4SetsOfCorsets: MARTHA LOOKED SO CONFUSED  
NarrativeControl: "Did i break him?" "Dont worry M'am he just has a massive crush on your brother"  
Damilton: HERCULES WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT  
4SetsOfCorsets: "Oh My god he's the Hamilton-Schuyler kid isnt he" "Yep" *Cue hysterical laughter*  
NarrativeControl: Shes texting someone now  
\-------------------------  
*TheCoolWashington to GWash(ingMAchine)*  
TheCoolWashington: OHMYGOD GEORGIE YOULL NEVER GUESS WHO I JUST MET  
GWash(ingMachine): Martha your in your 30's please text like it.  
TheCoolWashington: Fight me Georgo  
GWash(ingMachine): Fine, who did you meet?  
TheCoolWashington: Oh nobody, just Alexander Hamilton-Schuyler.  
GWash(ingMachine): Martha i swear to god  
TheCoolWashington: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)  
TheCoolWashington: I can see why you like him he is very cute  
GWash(ingMachine): M a r t h a  
\---------------------------------  
Angeli-kickyourass: Honestly Martha sounds like my spirit animal  
NarrativeControl: She's so cool.  
Damilton: She's buying me food because the others embarrassed me  
KinkGeorge: She sounds lovely  
4SetsOfCorsets: She is literally the opposite of GWash  
Pegarita: How opposite  
NarrativeControl: If we added her to chat she would fit right in  
Turtle.Boi: H o l y S h i t A d d H e r  
ABurrSir: is it not against school rules to do that though?  
4SetsOfCorsets: We asked and she said she wasnt sure but she gave us her number and said shed text us when she found out  
NarrativeControl: I aspire to be that cool when im in my thirtys  
Damilton: Same.  
\-------------------------------  
TheCoolWashington: These kids you teach are so fun George  
GWash(ingMachine): How many of them did you meet?  
TheCoolWashington: Alexander, Eliza, Hercules?  
GWash(ingMachine): I only teach Alexander of those three, Miss Schuyler does Advanced Mathematics and Mr Mulligan does Fashion design  
TheCoolWashington: Ah, k  
TheCoolWashington: So i couldnt help but notice that The others where referred to be Mr and Miss but Alexander was referred to by using his name ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)  
GWash(ingMachine): Jesus Christ Martha  
\--------------------------  
*"@God please dont hate us"*  
NarrativeControl: I k i n d a wanna add MWash to this chat  
Damilton: Please dont the majority of this sin fest is just us talking about her brothers dick  
JeSuisChrist: Not True, alot of it is also talking about Hercules dick  
MacaroniAndMe: Yea why are we even in this chat it focuses on Eliza and Alexanders relationships  
Damilton: IM NOT DATING GWASH AND I WiLL NOT BE IN THE VISIBLE FUTURE  
JeSuisChrist: You wish tho  
Damilton: Oh fuck yea  
Damilton: My ass would be bent over his desk in a h e a r t b e a t  
*NarrativeControl added TheCoolerWashington to "@God please dont hate us"*  
Damilton: E L I Z A WHY  
TheCoolerWashington: Holy shit kid you got it b a d  
NarrativeControl: I told her we have a porn chat and she wanted in  
JeSuisChrist: Hi we havent met yet but i am the rich french Marquis De Lafayette  
TheCoolerWashington: Nice  
MacaroniAndMe: We also havent met, I am Thomas Jefferson, Lafayette but southern  
TheCoolerWashington: i feel like I've met your mom  
MacaroniAndMe: Martha Jefferson?  
TheCoolerWashington: Ya ive met your mom  
TheCoolerWashington: I am the alpha martha  
JeSuisChrist: Holy shit you are fun  
NarrativeControl: Aint she just  
\------------------------------  
*Pegarita added Turtle.Boi , Damilton , NarrativeControl, KinkGeorge, ABurrSir, MacaroniAndMe, SicklyAndPrickly, 4SetsOfCorsets, JeSuisChrist, Angeli-kickyourass and GWash(ingMachine) to "WHAT DID ANGELICA DO"*  
Pegarita: I JUST SAW ANGELICA AND JAMES REYNOLDS GET MARCHED AWAY BY PRINCIPAL FRANKLIN I NEED ANSWERS  
GWash(ingMachine): Why am i here? How did you get my number, Miss Schuyler?  
Pegarita: YOUR HERE BECAUSE YOUR A TEACHER AND YOU CAN GET ME ANSWERS AND FROM ALEXANDERS PHONE (Change your passcode babs)  
Damilton: ILL TELL YOU WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED  
Damilton: Sir please excuse my language  
GWash(ingMachine): Excused  
Damilton: YOU KNOW HOW JAMES REYNOLDS HAS THAT GIRLFRIEND, MARIA?  
MacaroniAndMe: Didnt you have sex with her last year  
Damilton: NOT CURRENTLY AN ISSUE  
NarrativeControl: Continue, Alexander  
Damilton: WELL ME, ANGELICA AND GEORGE FREDRICK WHERE NEAR THE LIBRARY DOING MAKE UP  
Damilton: AND REYNOLDS COMES OUT THE LIBRARY FUCKING D R A G G I N G MARIA  
Damilton: SO THE THREE OF US ARE ALREADY ON OUR FEET  
JeSuisChrist: Oh my god  
Damilton: AND HE STARTS YELLING AT HER AND WE COULDNT REALLY UNDERSTAND, SO WE MOVE CLOSER AND HE JUST YELLS "YOU BROKEN FUCKING BITCH"  
KinkGeorge: AND ANGELICA JUST SPRINTS OVER AND FUCKING YANKS HIM AWAY FROM HER  
KinkGeorge: WE CATCH UP AND ARE LIKE "What the fuck are you doing"  
Damilton: AND MARIA, MY CURRENT QUEEN, LOOKS STRAIGHT AT HIM AND GOES "I'm asexual, asshole."  
KinkGeorge: HE WENT TO ATTACK HER AND ANGELICA JUST FUCKING DECKS HIM  
Pegarita: Angelica cant stand people like that im not suprised  
Damilton: SOMEONE ALERTED PRINCIPAL FRANKLIN AT SOME POINT BECAUSE HE JUST MARCHED OUT AND GRABBED EM BOTH  
GWash(ingMachine): That young man will likely be expelled, Franklin isnt one for tolerating such ideals on his campus, and being seen being physically violent towards another student because of such ideals will definetley ensure that he is gone quickly.  
Pegarita: And Angelica?  
GWash(ingMachine): Ah, probably a warning or suspension, she was of course acting in defense of herself and another student. If the punishment seems to be any more serious for her i will step in and ensure it is lowered.  
Turtle.Boi: THAT FUCKING DICK I SHOULDA BEEN THERE TO DECK HIM  
NarrativeControl: Thank you for looking out for Angelica sir, and guys, is Maria okay?  
KinkGeorge: She's kinda shook but we took her to the nearest coffee shop and we are getting her a hot chocolate  
Damilton: Im gonna add her to the other groupchat, and thanks again for looking out for Angelica sir  
GWash(ingMachine): It is no problem Alexander :)  
\----------------------  
*Damilton added LittleRedDress to 'Help Us"*  
LittleRedDress: What an ominous chat name  
ABurrSir: Your Maria, right?  
LittleRedDress: Yep, can i get introductions? I dont know alot of ya  
Damilton: Yea, sure, Im Alexander, like you may of guessed  
Turtle.Boi: John Laurens in the place to be  
4SetsOfCorsets: Hercules Mulligan  
Damilton: Angeli-kickyourass is Angelica Schuyler, the girl who punched James  
NarrativeControl: Elizabeth Schuyler  
Pegarita: And Peggy!  
LittleRedDress: We have law together dont we?  
Pegarita: Professer Monroes class?  
LittleRedDress: Ya  
JeSuisChrist: I, am,  
Damilton: If you put your full name i s2g  
JeSuisChrist: Marie-Joseph Paul Yves Roch Gilbert du Motier, Marquis De Lafayette  
LittleRedDress: What the shit dude  
JeSuisChrist: Why is that everyones reaction when they hear it  
Damilton: Your name is l o n g  
SicklyAndPrickly: James Madison  
MacaroniAndMe: Thomas Jefferson  
LittleRedDress: ((Holy Shit its the macaroni man))  
KinkGeorge: I am George Fredrick the Third, Crown Prince of England  
LittleRedDress: Your the guy with the dope makeup who bought me this fancy ass hotchocolate right?  
KinkGeorge: Yes, that would be me  
LittleRedDress: I feel less bad about how much this hot chocolate cost now i know your a prince  
LittleRedDress: How do y'all know so much royalty  
Damilton: Idk tbh  
ABurrSir: I am Aaron Burr  
LittleRedDress: is that all of y'all?  
ABurrSir: Yes, i believe so.  
LittleRedDress: Welp, hi guys, I'm Miss Maria Lewis, and i guess I've joined yo squad!

**Author's Note:**

> Happy Valentines Day, this is your gift  
> It was supposed to go up on Wednesday but i finished it early, so why not  
> This is gonna develop into a series that should update every wednesday if y'all are interesed in that
> 
> Some of this is fictional, some is based on actual chats ive had with friends  
> (That animal crossing thing is unfortunately real)


End file.
